Today is my first Father’s Day in 55 years that I do not have a dad to call or send a card or gift to. It feels odd, sad, and really weird but the reality is that my dad is no longer here with us. All I have today is memories to carry me through.
I remember when I was young my dad ran a service station. It was a Texaco station. My dad was so proud to wear that uniform. The Texaco slogan was:”You can trust your car to the man who wears the star” and my dad was that kind of man. If he worked on your car, it was fixed when he got through with it. We left there when I was 12, and all that remains is an empty building that has a faint outline of the word TEXACO.
My dad went on to work for Bell Helicopter in Amarillo, TX, Cummins Diesel, Fruehauf, and later moved to work at Lone Star Steel in East Texas, before retiring. He loved the lake and fishing was his favorite hobby. He loved to smoke meat for us when we would come to visit. He always made sure there was food on his table for us to enjoy. He was also a gardener. He has always had fresh veggies up until the last couple of years of his life. In an enviable way, my dad knew what he enjoyed and he did those things on a daily basis.
Times were not always easy with my dad, but isn’t it funny that when you let go of the bitterness you feel toward someone, the memories are good ones. My dad was headstrong, determined and things were to be done a certain way. But that was ok. At least he had a way for things to be done. He was meticulous about his tools, for which I am glad that has rubbed off on me. His tools were his livelihood. If you did take care of them…. You didn’t have anything to provide a living with.
As you go through today calling your dad, or having lunch with your dad or just visiting with your dad build some memories that will sustain you in years to come. Because, there will come a day when memories are all you have.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Saturday, June 19, 2010
A Screeching Halt
I find it amazing and a little humorous at what it takes for us to come to a complete halt in what we are doing. For me, it was a blown out back. I mean hurt, gut-wrenching pain that stopped me in my tracks. I found myself in a position of ninty degrees, looking at the ground when trying to stand up. I have found after 2 trips to the emergency room at 2 different hospitals, CT scans and x-rays and numerous iv’s and pain medications, and 7 trips to a chiropractor that I have damaged my sciatic nerve in the lower portion of my back. Needless to say, I have found what makes me stop in my tracks.
During the past 2 weeks I have been out of my bed only for a bath, shower and doctor visits. I tried to get up and eat at the table, but that did not work well. It is very interesting to just lay here and watch the world go by around you. My mom, sister and her family are headed to the Bahamas. My inlaws have headed to Sweetwater, Tennessee for a weekend getaway. My daughter is teaching a class this morning. My granddaughter is going to go see Toy Story 3 at the new movie theater. My nephew and his wife are taking his 2 kids to see the movie also. Two of my best friends are just getting back from youth camp. Steve has mowed the lawn, cleaned the truck and is headed up to the car wash with my vehicle. He has asked me to make a grocery list and see what we have in the pantry that we can work with for food next week. Humm…. That would require standing up.
I am not whining about not being able to move. I am more intrigued with what it feels like and what it does to my emotions to not be able to move. I never really think much about what it is like to have to be totally still or even just not be able to get myself around. Steve has been waiting on me all week, bringing me food and water and whatever I needed. I don’t sit around much, so this is really difficult if just from the physical stand point. I have not been able to do one single thing in the last week that I do on a normal basis.
And you are thinking…. So, what is your point? Thought you would never ask. I find that I am needed. I do a lot to help make some other people’s lives easier. I have an encouraging spirit that is missed and therefore someone that would normally have a perky attitude is having a rough week. Someone that normally has a smile on their face because I helped put it there with some silly, witty wise crack or joke is not smiling today. Maybe there was a woman that walked into my work place and had just received some disturbing news about her health and needed the encouragement to start working out with us, but I was not there to smile, hug her and tell her that we are going to help her get through this. My point is that all of us have something that someone else needs. I am nothing special, except through the Lord. I know that if I am willing, He can use me in mighty ways. Not necessarily to rock the house down, just to help someone make it through something. We are all connected to each other. I think about my Bryan and his infectious smile and silly giggle. There are a lot of people that need to hear that on a daily basis. I think about my mom and her ability to just listen, and I know she has a lot of people that depend on her to do just that. I think about my grandchildren and wonder what will be in store for them.
Don't sell yourself short. God has many purposes for you being here today. Think about your abilities and then about those whose lives you touch and what they would be like without you. There will most likely be places were you can say "Job well done!" and places where you may need to step it up a bit. Who in your life is looking at you and you are the only "Jesus" they will ever know?
During the past 2 weeks I have been out of my bed only for a bath, shower and doctor visits. I tried to get up and eat at the table, but that did not work well. It is very interesting to just lay here and watch the world go by around you. My mom, sister and her family are headed to the Bahamas. My inlaws have headed to Sweetwater, Tennessee for a weekend getaway. My daughter is teaching a class this morning. My granddaughter is going to go see Toy Story 3 at the new movie theater. My nephew and his wife are taking his 2 kids to see the movie also. Two of my best friends are just getting back from youth camp. Steve has mowed the lawn, cleaned the truck and is headed up to the car wash with my vehicle. He has asked me to make a grocery list and see what we have in the pantry that we can work with for food next week. Humm…. That would require standing up.
I am not whining about not being able to move. I am more intrigued with what it feels like and what it does to my emotions to not be able to move. I never really think much about what it is like to have to be totally still or even just not be able to get myself around. Steve has been waiting on me all week, bringing me food and water and whatever I needed. I don’t sit around much, so this is really difficult if just from the physical stand point. I have not been able to do one single thing in the last week that I do on a normal basis.
And you are thinking…. So, what is your point? Thought you would never ask. I find that I am needed. I do a lot to help make some other people’s lives easier. I have an encouraging spirit that is missed and therefore someone that would normally have a perky attitude is having a rough week. Someone that normally has a smile on their face because I helped put it there with some silly, witty wise crack or joke is not smiling today. Maybe there was a woman that walked into my work place and had just received some disturbing news about her health and needed the encouragement to start working out with us, but I was not there to smile, hug her and tell her that we are going to help her get through this. My point is that all of us have something that someone else needs. I am nothing special, except through the Lord. I know that if I am willing, He can use me in mighty ways. Not necessarily to rock the house down, just to help someone make it through something. We are all connected to each other. I think about my Bryan and his infectious smile and silly giggle. There are a lot of people that need to hear that on a daily basis. I think about my mom and her ability to just listen, and I know she has a lot of people that depend on her to do just that. I think about my grandchildren and wonder what will be in store for them.
Don't sell yourself short. God has many purposes for you being here today. Think about your abilities and then about those whose lives you touch and what they would be like without you. There will most likely be places were you can say "Job well done!" and places where you may need to step it up a bit. Who in your life is looking at you and you are the only "Jesus" they will ever know?
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