As I study and search for what I am going to do with the next 20 years of my life, I cannot help but reflect back on the past 20 years. I have, with the help of my soul mate raised 4 children to adulthood, gone back to college, started a career in interior design and worked for the second largest retailer in America for 13 years. Through work I have helped hundreds of clients fulfill their dreams for their homes. I have seen all four of my children graduate from high school and take some form of college classes. I have seen them start careers, start families and start making a home for themselves. I have also been there to see 5 precious grandchildren brought into this world.
It is not that I feel like my job is done with my children even though they are grown and have been away from home for quite some time now. But they need their space. They need to stand up and fall down and pick themselves up again without me being right there hovering over them. I think they all know that I am there if they really need help. My job has just changed when it comes to my children. It requires less of my physical time and energy, but more of my prayer time and energy. I want for each one of them to soar like an eagle. Not as I would soar, but as they want to soar. I want them to find what makes them truly happy and contented and do it! I want them to be comfortable in their own skin and have a soul mate that will let them do and be and say what they feel is them. I want them to be kind and gentle to each other, strong when they need to take a stand that they truly believe in and never give in to being anything other than their true selves. When they see a reflection, I want them to know who it is they are looking at, and like what they see. When they stand and look deep into their own eyes I want them to know they are doing their best with what the Lord has given them to work with.
Today I do not know what I will be doing 20 years from now. I want to continue, as I have tried to do all my life, helping others who cannot find the top of the hole because they have dug themselves so deep. I want to teach them how to stop digging. I know that God is stirring something up inside of me and I am nervous and excited about it all at the same time.
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And what a ride it has been! Didn't I warn you? Thanks for being there...and for being you. I love you...
ReplyDeleteI love you too :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for spending so much thought energy in asking Jesus what He wants out of yourself for me. Some parents just don't care once their kids are gone. Some care too much. Some don't care the whole time their kids are right in front of their face. And you and Dad never chose to be that way with me. In fact, you showed me you loved me, instead of making me guess. That makes it easy.
Even though we differ sometimes, I'm very thankful that I have you. I'm still growing in so many ways, and I hope you are too (because what's the point if you're not?!), and I always want to be the example of Isaiah 1 when he says, "Come, let us reason together."
I hope that makes you proud.
I love you.
-Brad